It's Friday! Thought for the day...

Funny, before I had a child I never realized that Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and The Alphabet Song (is that the real title?  Does it even have a title?) both had the same tune...

This doesn't sound like it would be problem, BUT IT IS!  In fact I just heard from the other room:

"ABCDEFGHIJKL (bear with me here...) MNOPQRSTUVWXYZ... Now I wonder what you are...."

Who ever thought that one up was either too lazy to think of their own tune or totally trying to screw with the little people.  Slow clap anonymous song writer, slow clap.

We do it to ourselves...

Welcome to Adulthood!  You will now be faced with a series of extremely difficult and life-altering choices that look something like this:

• Go to college - don't go to college
• Get married - don't get married
• Have kids - don't have kids
• Have one kid - have more kids
• Stay at home with the kid(s) - go back to work

Each decision with its own set of pros and cons, benefits and costs and frankly mind-blowing ramifications.  And yet, everyone usually has a strong opinion about each of these very personal choices (the key word here is personal... in case the italics didn't cover it) -- we call that judgement folks, otherwise known as 'should-ing'. 

So when faced with these decisions, they actually look something like this:

• Go to college - don't go to college (but for heaven's sake MAKE A DECISION and god forbid you should ever change your mind!)
• Get married - don't get married (AKA, you'd better get married lest you be livin' in SIN, Oh, and if you don't have a partner - WHY NOT?  WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?)
• Have kids - don't have kids (In other words, you'd better be having them, and if you can't, WHY CAN'T YOU??? So there you are, left with the equally challenging option of fertility treatments - no fertility treatments or adopt - don't adopt)
• Have one kid - have more kids (Well finally, you had one and WHAT?  You're even considering stopping there?  WHAT THE HELL?)
• Stay at home with the kid(s) - go back to work (Well, aren't you lucky if this decision is even part of your reality you spoiled BRAT!)

Seem a little harsh?  Maybe, but in the past 14 years, I can honestly say that I have fielded questions in each of these categories and been met with similar responses - either real or perceived.  Yes, you read that correctly, I said real or perceived.  What I am trying to say is that yes, you will be judged by many others for any/all decisions that you make in life.  However, if you can forgive/accept yourself for making those choices (or avoiding them all together) then there won't be a problem.  In other words, be kind to yourself and the rest will follow...

Sounds simple enough, right?  It really is.  So ALLOW, and let go of JUDGEMENT (especially of yourself, but of others too).  And for pete's sake, quit 'should-ing' all over yourself!

Wishing you light and love as you make each of the 'tough' decisions...

Marebare

Yet another recycling saga

You may recall that last year during my 'No Impact Week Challenge' I found out that soft plastics were a 'no-go' in terms of recycling... pretty much anywhere in this fine Province.  So you can just imagine my delight when I arrived at my recyling depot last week and found a sign stating that they are now accepting plastic bags.  Those of you who follow me on facebook might have seen my post about this miraculous day.  If you missed it, it read:

Best. Day. Ever. ... Okay, maybe not ever, but a great day nonetheless. My recycling depot is now accepting plastic bags!!! I have been saving any/all of those things for just the occasion. About 6 years. Yes, literally. It's the small things really...

You might be thinking to yourself, wow, is this chick ever DRAMATIC!  And, you would be right... remember, this is the same lady who uses CAPSlock for EVERYTHING and ellipses and exclamation points and... well, you get the point.  Anyway, needless to say, I was pretty stoked about the recycling development in my community.

For some reason, call it a whim, or call it intuition that somethings really ARE too good to be true, I decided to call the town prior to dropping of my latest recycling bags.  I think you know where I am going with this...  THEY HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT!!!!!  And actually, they were pretty indignant that I would suggest such a thing.  Soooooo, I proceeded to take all of the newly added bags out of my recycling pile (*sigh), and headed down to the recycling station with my iPhone handy... you know, just in case I was ACTUALLY RIGHT.  Which, ahem, I was:

Soooo, of course, I phoned the town again (they were a little less indignant this time), and believe it or not, I kept my cool.  Here was the forwarded e-mail reply from their service provider...

Yes, this bin is just being used as a switch while the regular bin's door
is repaired... this bin is from another area that accepts these materials
(even though no markets exist for most non-stamped film plastic (most
plastic bags fall under this category) and therefore much of this material
ends up being land-filled anyways -- which is why we don't accept it in our
program).

The proper bin will be placed back into service by the week after next at
latest.
Soooo, I guess this means I am back to storing 6 years worth of plastic bags (about a garbage bag full)... anyone have any brilliant ideas what I could/should do with them?

Marebare

These are a few of my favorite things... FALL edition

I love all of the seasons... I do, honest!  I know, I know, winter is way too long, spring is way too messy/dirty, fall is much too short and summer... what summer?  I have heard them all.  Listen here Canadians (and many Northern-dwelling Americans and anyone else who is fortunate enough to have FOUR seasons), we have it good.  I know, I know, the weather in Hawaii is fantastic every day of the year, however we couldn't very well all live on those tiny islands now could we?  So, let's embrace change and the cyclical nature of our existance... for each new season comes in bearing a whole host of gifts. 

Fall... ah fall.  Where I live, it is already here.  It arrived literally overnight as we closed the chapter of summer with one final week of above-average temperatures.  There are definite signs when fall is here, from the obvious visual resplendence of the leaves to the less obvious 'feel' in the air.  Autumn air is heavy with the smells of harvest and carries an unmistakable bite of chilliness... foreshadowing for the winter winds to come.  The air is also filled with the cacophony of geese, ducks and other birds who are 'getting the heck out of dodge'! 

The 'feast for the senses' described above is one of the reasons why I think Autumn is wonderful.  Here are some of my other favorite things about FALL:

• Having fires in the woodstove once again
• Sipping tea and curling up on the couch (preferably in the sun) reading a great book (I just finished a life-changing book: Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping)
• Playing in the leaves (even more fun now with Chephren)

• Jumping hay bails (What?  I didn't play enough as a kid and I am making up for it now)
• Harvesting my garden (wellll... I don't love the actual harvesting part, but I LOVE the food!)

• Firing up my crockpot and diving once again into soups, stews and other warm 'comfort' foods.

What do you love about Fall? 

Marebare

Yoga is my skinny jeans...

If you haven't noticed, I have a slightly short attention span.  Okay, okay, more like a mild case of ADD!  (Let's just say that if that diagnosis existed back when I was in school I was a shoo-in!)  Needless to say, each week (day, hour, minute) I have a new interest/passion.  This is reflected oh-so-brilliantly by the stack of books by my bed.  I am someone who is almost incapable of reading 'just one book' at a time. 

Lucky for me, I am at the point in my life now where most of my areas of interest are simply being 'recycled', meaning that they are all hobbies that I have already pursued.  I have spent most of the past 20 years being frustrated by this... wondering why I don't have the mental tenacity to 'stick with' anything.  More recently though, I have tried to relax into this pattern, realizing that 'it is what it is' and that by resisting something so instrinsic to my being I am wasting a lot of energy. 

Of late, I have once again renewed my passion and dedication to my yoga practice.  I have been practicing yoga (somewhat consistently) for about 10 years.  In 2005 I completed my 200 hr. Yoga Teacher Training down in Mexico which was truly one of the highlights of my life thus far.  After giving birth to Chephren, it took me a few months to return to my practice and when I did, it was quite sporadic in nature.  All of that changed when That Yoga Place - a hot yoga studio, opened up in Spruce Grove last summer.  I immediately purchased a one year membership and made a re-commitment to my practice.  I have also started teaching a few classes there which has been a great experience thus far. 

Why am I ranting about all of this?  Well, thanks to my shiny-new 'going with the flow' attitude (which I also call 'following the signs'), I have been recently introduced to a new (to me) yoga style called 'The Rocket'.  Invented by the late (and great) Larry Shultz (THE yoga teacher of the Grateful Dead), it is an Ashtanga-like routine that I am told will 'get me there faster'.  Really what it does is make a lot of the advanced poses (arm balances, forearm stands, handstands, etc.) accessible to everyone.  Here is a cool video to give you an idea of what it looks like:


rocket on the deck from peg mulqueen on Vimeo.

Thus far, The Rocket training (and more likely the amazing teacher that I am learning from) has me re-inspired and I feel a re-ignited passion for my yoga practice.  Yoga is my skinny jeans, meaning that when everything in my life is going well (which is pretty well is) then I seem to be able to reap the benefits of yoga even more... (it also helps that lots of yoga seems to help me back into my skinny jeans all over again!)  What I need to work on then is making yoga my 'comfy sweats'... something that I return to EVERY SINGLE DAY because of the comfort/calm/solace that it brings me.  For now though, I think I will 'enjoy the ride' of the Rocket and rock out in my skinny jeans.

Namaste,

Marebare

When Opposites Attract...

My husband and I have been together for 13 years... married for 7 (I think... yeah, that's right), but together for THIRTEEN!  That is almost half of my life!!!!  Okay, that was a bit of wishful thinking there, but you get the point, it is a relatively long time.  We started dating when I was 19... did you catch that? NINETEEN!  So, basically I was a child... (and I just outed my age on the internet).  Trent was only 20 (there, now I took him down with me).  Yup, just kids we were.

Trent and I with one of the VW vans that we lived in... this one's a '79

Why am I ranting about this?  No, it's not our anniversary (I don't think... nope, it's not).  I am bringing this up because I want to talk about change... and compromise.  You see, looking back (and looking around), it would appear that in today's culture 'your twenties' is a decade of intense and profound personal development (aka change).  During this time, we essentially move from being dependent adolescents into independent adults (well, most of us do anyways).  It should be noted that my generation (and the generations that are following me) are extremely fortunate to be afforded this decade of self-discovery.  Things were quite different for those who have come before me -- even for my parents.  Thirty, forty, fifty years ago (and before), the transition from teenager to adult was swift and complete... with many people finding themselves with a mortgage, families and full-time jobs by the time they were in their early to mid-twenties.  This still occurs today, although much less frequently, with most young adults choosing to stay 'in the nest' until they are finished college or even beyond.  I am getting off topic here, so I will make my point: Trent and I have both changed... a LOT.

Now I know what you're going to say... 'people don't change'.  And to some extent I would agree with you.  Fundamental personality traits probably don't change that much, but life circumstances do, and we must therefore adapt to 'keep up with the times'.  Experiences change people, and in thirteen years, we have been fortunate to have had a lot of 'experiences'.  Travelling, working, university, marriage, parenthood... (the nostalgia is setting in)... needless to say, it has been quite a ride. 

The thing is, Trent and I have always been 'different' (and by different I mean TOTAL OPPOSITES OF ONE ANOTHER!!!)  My maid of honor made a comment at our wedding that was something along the lines of... 'I never thought that I would see the day when a hippy would marry a red neck'...  Me neither Catherine... me neither.  And yet, here we are. 

Now I am not a huge fan of labels as I find them quite restrictive... and I use them here only to help make the point that we are indeed quite different (and I am apparently not alone in my thinking).  In this case, I also like the images that these particular labels conjur up in the mind (peace vs. guns, fresh garden veggies vs. steak, yoga vs. quadding) etc.  I think you get the picture (at least I would hope so after five paragraphs - five?  Oh man, this is turning into a wordy RANT!)

Trent ripping it up this winter

Me, contemplating the Universe, Yoga Teacher Training, 2005

The point that I am trying to not-so-succintly make is that after thirteen years of growing/changing/developing in our relationship and as individuals we are more different than ever.  Trent just came home from a weekend of quadding with a friend... his idea of HEAVEN!  I spent the weekend on my road bike and doing yoga... dreaming of road bike/mountain bike races/events that I would like to enter and yoga retreats that I would like to do...  Essentially, we both spent the weekend in our glory.  Apart, but still happy. 

In the past, we have tried to 'dabble' in each other's worlds.  Trent once biked with me from Banff to Jasper (288 km)... we rode a tandem.  As an indication of how that went: I WILL NEVER GET ON A BICYCLE WITH THAT MAN AGAIN!!!! EVER!!!!  Trent also came to one (yes, just one) of my yoga classes... and injured himself because he was competing with me (yes, I was teaching the class)... enough said about that. 
I have also taken more than a few rides on a variety of Trent's 'death machines' and bought, eaten and prepared more than my share of dead cow.  See?  We try.

Shortly after Trent had a full-on temper tantrum in the bushes... ask me to tell you this story in person... it is HILARIOUS!

Me, hoping that I don't meet my demise

As we move through life though, we seem to try less and less.  I stick with what I know and like, and he does the same.  We do our best to compromise, but really, at this point, it is more about accepting each others differences. 

Thankfully, we do have a few things in common...

Our love of travel:

The Hasse's in Chile, 2007

Our love of the mountains:

The Hasse's on Mt. Aberdeen (with Forrest)... shortly before we were heli-rescued... again, ask me to tell you that story in person... it is CRAZY!

Some amazing friends:

Summit of Mt. Wilcox for my dad's 50th B-day!

Post ice-climbing shot

and of course, this little gem:

Awwwww....

Speaking of which, I can't help but think that while all of our differences make our relationship a bit challenging (okay a lot challenging) at times, Chephren is sure to reap the benefits of this situation.  Thanks to us, he loves quadding and yoga, veggies and meat, biking and drinking beer (okay, maybe not that last thing, but you get the idea).  What I am trying to say is that our differences are a GIFT.  A gift to our son.  Huh.  I have never thought of it that way before.

With that said, 'Vive Les Differences'!!!!  Life would sure be boring if we were all the same :)

Marebare

Practicin' what I be Preachin'

Chephren is an artist too (yes, he is only two, but remember, we are ALL artists)!  To reinforce/cultivate this belief in him, we try make time for art very regularly - at least once or twice per week but lately, given his interest in it, more.  I have a great supply of art materials leftover from my one art course in University (where I myself was beyond shocked to learn for the first time that gasp! I myself was an artist).  As you know, I am still working on re-building that belief system, but that is another entry (or twenty), so let's focus instead on the next generation... bringing us back to Chephren and his burgeoning creativity.

Today we started our creative time with watercolor paints (I stayed there, Chephren went on to experiment with chalk pastels, glitter, felt markers and pencil crayons).  Here are the results of today's endeavors:

The felt-marker piece

The chalk pastel piece

The watercolor piece

As you can see, Chephren excels at experimenting within each of the mediums, exploring primarily color, but also different brush sizes (with the painting) and different techniques (blending colors with his fingers in the chalk pastel piece).

If you are interested in exploring art with a young person, here are some tips that I can offer you (some of them mine, and some of them from my course in Uni):

• Set your space up so that you aren't worried about the MESS -- art can/should be messy.  We do art either in the basement where I don't care about the mess or at the kitchen counter where it is easy to wipe up spills/messes.
• If you are painting or doing anything wet, it is fun/practical to designate an 'artists smock' for such activities.  Chephren picked his from an old stack of shirts and loves wearing it.
• Don't impose any rules on them (especially at such a young age)... when they are older, you can begin to discuss techniques/themes/mediums/effects, WHATEVER, but the main idea here is to make it FUN!  Encourage them to play, experiment and gosh-darnit, do whatever the heck that they like!
• 'Art' goes beyond coloring books (although these do have a limited purpose in teaching fine-motor skills and yes, I do have one in my 'restaurant bag'), BUT, this isn't the time/place for them.  Enough said.
• Don't be afraid to let them try out new/different tools/mediums.  This way, they will come to know which ones they love to play/experiment/create with and it won't be imposed.  Of course, choose materials that are non-toxic and if possible, washable, but think outside the box in terms of what those little people are capable of.  If you are worried about how they treat the materials, build that into the 'lesson'. 
• Display your child's work with pride.  I have an 'artist's wall' in our playroom and Chephren gets to choose which pieces go onto the wall.  We also have conversations about playing around or practicing vs. doing our 'best work'.  Encourage your child to sign their work (if they are a bit older) and to give it a name.  Discuss what they created and why... (again, more for older children).  If you are planning on keeping the pieces for a scrapbook, it might be fun to record what they tell you on the back of the piece as well as the date.
• We like to play music in the background while we work... doesn't have to be kids music either.  Pick something that you will both enjoy.
• Lastly and maybe even most importantly: PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH.  Hence the subject line of this post.  When Chephren and I sit down for 'creative time', I do just that, sit down and create alongside him.  That way he sees that indeed, we are all artists and that art is important enough to make time for... at any age.  Who knows, you might just like it!  Here is my watercolor piece from today...


You might recognize this from a photograph that I took in Kelowna... hey, I am not quite as inspired Chephren is... yet!


• Oh, and one more thing: it might be fun to do a piece collectively... and just see what comes up.  Here is one that we did today:

And all of this advice from someone who is creatively 'blocked'.  Huh.

Happy creating!

Marebare (and Chephren)