Contraction

I have an addiction.

I am addicted to feeling good.  To having lots of energy.  To laughter.  To play.  To the feeling of a light and open heart.

When I feel like this, I feel as if I could do anything.  I feel like I am home.  I feel like I AM all that I can be, or at least well on my way there.

When I don't feel this way, I feel like something is wrong.  I feel like I am broken in some way.  And I resist it.  I fight it.  I struggle against it.

I once heard Marianne Williamson compare the experience of "waking up" to giving birth.

This comparison allowed for powerful imagery within me, allowing me to readily identify with it.  In my journey, I have often found myself heading forward, accelerating towards the light and all of the possibilities that might live there.  This is the part of the journey that I live for, it is what feels good to me.  This forward movement, this expansion, it is what feeds my addiction.

And yet we know that this is not how birthing happens.  No baby just slides its way out into the world in one effortless burst forward--and if it does happen this way, it is a rare occurrence!

Instead, what follows every forward burst, every expansion, is a period of contraction, where the baby actually moves back into the womb, retreating into the dark.

This contraction phase is everything that the expansion phase is not.  It is subtle.  It is quiet.  It is slow.   It represents the "yinside" of life, of the human experience.

According to the Tao, every single thing must fall into balance.  Every.  Single.  Thing.

This means that with every "expansion" that I experience, there MUST be a period of contraction.  Of low energy.  Of tranquility.  Of solitude.

And I am in this phase of contraction, with no where else to be but in it.

I want to stop craving the light, but I haven't.  Not yet anyway.  Wondering if I ever will.

For now, I am learning to be even gentler with myself.  Even softer.  I am looking for ways to honour this phase.  A quiet walk outside in the dark after dinner.  Allowing myself a deep stretch with a yin yoga practice.  Allowing my husband to step in and help out.

Grateful that this too, shall pass.

xoxo M.

A little bit of sunshine!

The sun is not shining here today.  But is SO doesn't matter.

Watch this and you'll see why...

I am quite possibly the luckiest woman alive, EVER.  Well, in my opinion anyway.

Shout out to 'Mr. Sunshine's dad'... Happy Birthday baby.

MareBare xoxo

When all else fails...

Feeling a bit lost today...
Cure = yoga.  A home practice to be exact.  AND, I have always wanted to do one these videos.

I am so not a techie.  But I figured it out.  And I will only get better.  And I love how I look like I was dipped in silver.  And I love my home practice.

For all of you 'twitterers': #bucketlist, #homepractice, #yoga, #bliss

Forgot the song credit: Everything at Once by Lenka.  Love it.

And She Finally Makes Her Point! - Part III

I have been talking... ok ranting, for the two posts about being uncomfortable and the fact that I needed to learn to get comfortable with this state of affairs.

So, why all of this talk about discomfort?  Well, in my experience discomfort tends to take me out of my centre.  In other words, it disturbs my peace.  I figured that if I could learn to 'get comfortable with discomfort' that I could avoid this disturbance and stay centred during the 'storms' that life throws at me.  That is my over-riding intention as of late.  To stay centred, peaceful, calm, in the face of, well, anything and everything.

Over the course of this series on discomfort, I have given you some examples of situations where physical discomfort has risen within me in recent times: being tired, being hungry, having low blood sugar, having sore feet, having a sore back, being cold... and I am sure that there are more but I have blocked them from my consciousness!  When you reflect back on your own life, I am guessing that you won't have to travel very far back in time to come up with your own examples, you might even be uncomfortable right now!  The fact is, physical discomfort is a reality of the human condition.  I would even say that it is inevitable, although using that word makes me uncomfortable (ha!).

An interesting observation that I have made within myself is how readily I seem to attach myself to my feelings of physical discomfort.  My reaction to discomfort has become so ingrained that I actually lose myself in the sensation of it.  I become it.

I become tired.  I become cold.  I become sore.  I become hungry.

In each of these situations, I allow the sensations that I am experiencing to permeate my being, my consciousness.

Notice that I used the word allow.  In other words, I am saying that I am making a choice.  This is important, because it means that rather than allowing, I also have the choice to not allow.

In the last post, I talked about the voice in my head and the inner knowing that lies in my heart.  When a situation arises that causes me to feel uncomfortable, here is an example of how it would typically play out in my head before I understood that it could actually look different.

Let's use being tired as an example.  As I shared earlier, for some reason, this physical sensation is one that really pushes my buttons!

Imagine this.  Let's say that I have a young child (if you have one, you likely already know where I am going with this!)  Imagine that this particular child is not a great sleeper.  In fact, this child loves to stay up as late as possible, wakes up often during the night, gets up early and quite often doesn't nap.  After a few less-sleep-than-usual days in a row, his parents are starting to get really tired.  Then the child has a really bad night because he is getting sick.  For the mom who really hates being tired, this is the last straw...

Ok, enough imagining.  That was me.  This type of scenario has happened to me before.  Several times.  Maybe even more than several.  And each and every time, until quite recently, this type of occurrence was enough to pull me out of my centre.  Actually, quite often it was enough to push me so far out of my centre that I would entertain feelings of despair.  I know what you're thinking.  Despair?  Because she's tired?  That doesn't make any sense!

And I would have to agree with you... now.  But when I was in it, my thoughts, the voice in my head, had taken the reigns and run away with the situation.  Rather than simply telling myself, 'Okay, you're tired, it's uncomfortable, it's no big deal, this too shall pass', I found myself saying, 'I can't get through the day, I am a terrible mom, my child will never sleep, Oh no, now he's sick, it is only going to get worse'.

Do you see where I am going with this?  Our thoughts create our reality.  If my thoughts were telling me that I couldn't do it, the fact is, I couldn't, or I did it but suffered greatly.  By simply waking up to the fact that I could change my thoughts and tell myself that all was well, the truth is, it was.

As of late, we have had a few sleepless nights with Chephren, one out in the backcountry when it was below freezing and he was getting sick with a cold (talk about an opportunity for the voice in my head to FREAK OUT), and then when we got home he spent a few hours of one night coughing so hard that he was repeatedly throwing up.

A beautiful (and cold!) morning in the backcountry

Now, I will admit the backcountry scenario did take me out of my centre a little bit, after all, we were a 6-hour kayak ride from the car and there was literally nothing I could do but wait until the morning and try to keep him warm, dry and comfortable.  I didn't sleep a wink.  But I got through it.  And I learned from it.  And I am grateful for having had the experience.

The night of throwing up?  Easy-peasy.  No dramas.  Didn't sleep much that night either, and I was feeling it the next day as I taught two yoga classes, but I managed to stay in my centre.  As I write this now, I can't help but smile to think about how far the voice is my head has come...

'By choosing your thoughts, and by selecting which emotional currents you will release and which you will reinforce, you determine the quality of your Light.  You determine the effects that you will have upon others, and the nature of the experiences of your life.'  ~ Gary Zukav from 'Seat of the Soul'

Shanti, Om.

MareBare

P.S.  I know that you probably don't want to hear this, but I think that I might have one more post about this topic in me.  Stay tuned for Part IV...

30 Years... 30 Reasons

I wrote this for my parents wedding 30th anniversary which happens to be today.  Their marriage and their love for each other is truly inspiring and something to be celebrated!

30 Reasons

1. A friendship like yours will endure the test of time.  2. Looking at each other with undying devotion.  3. Enough love  to carry you through even the toughest of times.  4. A sense of resolve  to see things through, even when you don’t know what you are up against.  5. Faith - In each other, in your marriage, in your family.  6. Trust  in each other and you know for certain where you stand.  7.  When you laugh  together, the world becomes a brighter place.  8. Working hard to always forgive, because everyone screws up sometimes. 9. Enough memories to fill your happy home and spill out into the homes of family and friends.  10. A sense of ease with each other, with yourselves.  11. Patience - because we all need to get our buttons pushed once in a while.  12. You could hold up a mountain with the support that you have shown each other.  13.  A sense of knowing that you are exactly where you need to be.  14. Seeing the gifts of each member of your family through the smoke and the mirrors.  15. You will always have dancing in the kitchen!  16. Taking comfort in each others presence, and through shared moments, words and caresses.  17. Understanding - for each other and of each other.  18. Celebrating your sense of fun and adventure, because there has been a lot of both!  19. Similarities - You know what they are.  20. Differences - Knowing that these are just as important to celebrate and embrace.  21. Having empathy for each other and being willing to see the world just a little bit differently.  22.  Finding a blessed source of intimacy in each other’s touch.  23. Cherishing your time  together, because that’s all we really have in this world.  24. You will never run out of things to talk about.  25.  You are an amazing team and together you make miracles happen.  26. Giving - of yourselves to each other.  27. Receiving - Because without this, there is no gift.  28. Bicycles built for two  - How many have there been?  29. Boats built for two  - Your newest addition.  30. HOPE  - For another 30 reasons to come.

I love you two like MAD!!! 

MareBare xoxo

Less is More

Close your eyes and imagine this.  No wait.  Open them.  Open your eyes!  You have to keep them open to follow along with my vision!  Sigh.  Let me start again.

Imagine yourself waking up to a stunningly beautiful day in February.  No, you haven’t been miraculously transported to a faraway land, you are still in the midst of winter in Alberta (or whatever cold climate you are imagining), but today is different.  The sun is shining, the snow is sparkling like a blanket of diamonds and you check the local forecast -- they are calling for a 5 degree day!  In FEBRUARY!  (That is like 40 degrees Farenheit for all of you Americans), which isn’t that warm but hey, in February, 5 degrees feels like a mid-summer’s day!  Anyway.  You get the idea.  It is a beautiful day.  An unexpectedly beautiful day, in the middle of a long cold winter.  A GIFT.  

Not the day in question, but you get the idea...

Now, imagine how you would like to spend that day.  You would surely go outside, maybe even sit on your deck and enjoy a cold beverage.  (Judge not ye warm climate people, a warm, sunny winter’s day definitely calls for a few cold ones).  

We just happened to have one of these days this past winter.  And do you want to know how I spent it?  Inside.  Moving and sorting through stuff.  (Can you sense my complete and utter disdain for this situation?)  

Yes, you read correctly, I spent what was without a doubt the nicest day of the winter dealing with my belongings.  Ohhhhhh how I wished for my van-living days right then.  When life was much simpler and our belongings consisted of a few bins of mouse-chewed on clothes and some outdoor gear.  

One of the vans we lived in -- this one's a '79

It was all I could do but take the entire contents of the trucks we were driving and not drive straight to the dump.  I mean honestly.  We have everything that we need already (the stuff that we moved in December, remember?), so what is all of this crap?  Well, you know the kind of stuff I am talking about.  The seasonal ‘gear’, the old University books/notes, the outgrown kids toys/clothes, that box of stuff that you inherited from your great aunt but you aren’t quite sure what to do with it.  

Most of us have this problem - the problem of too much stuff.  If you don’t have this problem than I applaud you.  I take my hat off to you, not only because you would’ve spent the day enjoying some cold ones, but because you will have undoubtedly mastered the fundamental truth that ‘less is truly more’.  We don’t need all of that stuff.  Truth is, we don’t even need most of that stuff that we think we need.  We could all do with a little, no, a lot less stuff.

It's not just me that thinks that either.  Check out this awesome video about stuff on TED Talks:

So look around.  What do you truly need?  I would say that if it isn’t truly beautiful, meaningful or useful than get rid of it.  What are you willing to live without?  What kind of space are you ready to open up in your life?  Remember, when something leaves your life, it opens up the space for something new to come in.  And I’m not talking about that cute new what-ever-it-is that you spotted at the mall either.

Here's to the fundamental truth that LESS TRULY IS MORE!  And the next time we have a 5 degree day in February, you know where I'll be!

Marebare xoxo

PS -- Believe it or not, I actually spent yesterday moving more (yes, MORE) stuff.  You can bet that most of that stuff is moving on out!  

Trying to get back to where it all began...

A bit of personal history is necessary before I get where I am going with this post.  So, in a nutshell, here is my life (with Trent) for the past 13 years, in point form to save you from as many boring details as possible:

• Trent and I started dating 13 years ago, while on a backpacking trip to Europe (it was a 'scandalous' beginning but I won't go into details here because they are NOT RELEVANT)
• We moved in together as soon as we got home and spent the next 5 years living in various apartments/condos/basement suites while we muddled around in the University system -- attempting to get our degrees (which we both did finally -- with only a tiny bit of resentment towards the University system, okay, maybe society in general)
• When we were both done, we did a van trip across the US and Canada -- we drove 15,000 miles in a '71 Volkswagon van -- picking up a kitten along the way and staying with many of the people we met in Europe
• Then we got 'real jobs' -- that lasted all of 1 year, enough time for us to get engaged, plan a wedding in Costa Rica and travel in Central America for 3 months

• From there we had plans to live in our van for the summer -- somewhere in the Rockies and then move to Asia to teach English...
• Enter Darcie Duffin and the Centre for Outdoor Education in Nordegg -- this is where we ended up living/volunteering for the summer/fall of 2004 and the year of 2005.  We absolutely fell in love with the community, the town and the lifestyle, but we were still 'restless', so...

• In the fall of 2005 we headed to South East Asia for 3 months.

This is where the story gets crazy...

• In January 2006 we decided that we needed to 'grow up' and 'get ready to be responsible enough' to start a family.
• We moved back to the family farm (which we just moved off of -- yeah, that's the one) and Trent got a 'real job' while I went back to school.

• Two more years of University for me (and two more degrees) and by the end of all of that?  Pregnant in 2008 with Chephren. 
• The 'plan' was in motion -- I could work part-time from home, Trent could work his 'real' job, my parents lived next door so we had lots of help... we had it made, right?

Honestly, (and here is where I sense the hate mail coming)... No.  Yes, I said No.  Meaning, no, we did not feel as though we had it made.  In fact, despite our immediate and deep love for our son, we couldn't help but feel... lost.  Sad.  Trapped.  Miserable.  Not all of the time, but way too much of it.

What happened? 

Well, for the past three years we have been pondering exactly that.  Recently, we have been getting closer to figuring it out, and in fact, a good friend of mine fully called me out yesterday.  The truth is we 'over-sacrificed'.  We changed our entire lives in order to start a family.  Why?  I am not sure exactly, but I would say that it is because we had a limited belief system about parenting and what it was all about.  This could be for a whole bunch of reasons, most of which are irrelevant, because all we have is NOW.  And right NOW, we are starting to see the error of our ways.  We are gradually coming back to who we were as people before we became parents, who we were as a couple.  As my friend so wisely pointed out to me yesterday, if you are happy as people and as a couple than Chephren is going to be just FINE.  More than fine.  He is going to be great.  The greatest gift we could give Chephren is to be AUTHENTIC.  We are starting to get that. 

From one extreme to the other and now, working our way back towards the middle.  Without judgement of ourselves, without criticism.  Enjoying where we are and where we may or may not be going.  Bliss.

I hope that you are living your authentic life and becoming more of who you truly are each and every moment of every day.  It is worth the slight discomfort :)

Marebare xoxo

Got Buttons?

Have you ever had someone 'push your buttons'?  If you said no, you are either a highly evolved, enlightened being or completely in denial!  The reality is, that most of us get our buttons pushed on an almost daily basis.  Your boss ticks you off, your child draws on your sofa, your husband complains about the dinner you spent hours making... sound familiar? 

I can only speak from personal experience, but my tendency in the past was to blame 'the other'... the situation/person that was the causing me to be miserable.  Even better, I wanted to complain about it/them to someone else -- you've heard the saying 'misery loves company'. 

Over the past year, I have begun to pay attention to all of the button-pushing happening in my life and I have come to see each and every instance as a gift.  Yes, you read that correctly, I said gift!  Now, before you get all 'up in arms' at me about this, hear me out.

I have come to understand that when someone/something is pushing my buttons, that it an opportunity to look inside myself and ask a very important question: WHY?  Why is this pushing my buttons, what is it in me that I need to look at/heal in order for this to not bother me anymore?  This *shift* in thinking not only allows you to take back your power (you fully gave it away as soon as you started blaming the other person), but it allows you to 'do the work' on your personal journey. 

Sound crazy?  Maybe.  But then again... maybe not.  It's worth thinking about though, wouldn't you agree?

Peace and love,

Marebare

Days 1-6 of The Receiving Project

Day 1: Music Jam/Drumming session with Chephren

In the midst of a crazy emtional day of moving my parents to their house in town - Chephren and I retreated home for a quick lunch break.  Sensing that I was quickly losing the 'inner stillness' leftover from Maui, tried to bring in some peace via meditation.  Too amped up for meditation (it tends to work best after asana practice), I decided that a chanting/drumming/dancing session was in order.  Chephren seemed to agree as he danced, drummed and sang right along with me.  He even had all of his toys dancing!  The next day, he pointed to his toys (yes, they were still in a pile, hey, we're moving!) and said, "Those are my happy dance toys mom!"  A worthy first gift from the Universe, no?

Day 2: Teaching Yoga - an act of Service

I have been reading the yoga Sutras lately and one of the Sutras jumped at me (I.5); it basically says that we should analyze our thoughts/deeds and try to cultivate only selfless thoughts (and actions).  Well for me, teaching yoga is an act of service, in other words, a selfless act.  To be honest, to date, I haven't totally loved the experience.  But what I realized recently is that I had been teaching from the wrong place - from ego instead of my heart.  I was always worried about/wrapped up in what people would think of the way I taught.  I was always fretting about not being 'good enough' to teach yoga.  Looking back on that way of thinking, it seems like a distant, well-meaning but totally ill-placed train of thought.  I have begun the process of switching from this train of non-productive thought (and really quite selfish way of thinking) to one of selflessness.  I set the intention at the beginning of each of my classes that my words/thoughts/actions will be of the highest service for all of those participating in the class and that each person attending will get exactly what they need from coming.  In other words, I really just want people to get the most out of their yoga practice.  By simply making that switch in my own being, gone are the worries and the anxiety that used to come with every class I taught.  Sound simple?  It really is.  And this shift in thinking is gift number 2 from the Universe.

Day 3: Many hands make light work

If you read my 'Quick Update' post, you will know that both my parents and Trent and I are attempting to move off the farm this month.  Couple this with the fact that we have been gone for the month of November and the house that Trent and I are moving into also needs to be moved out of, and well, you can just imagine the kind of stress/extra workload that we are exposed to on a daily basis.  Anyway, this past Friday and Saturday we focused on helping out my parents and I am pleased to report that they are mostly moved in to their new house.  So, Trent and I decided to spend Sunday trying to get ourselves organized for our move as well.  We began at the new house which, as I mentioned also needs to be moved out of first, before any of our moving can take place.  We also have a few details to fix up before moving in as well and eventually, we'll finish the basement but that is another post entirely.  Anyway, between Trent's Dad, his partner, Trent and myself, we managed to get the kitchen almost entirely packed up and cleaned out!  It was a job that I was kind of dreading but turned out to be actually quite satisfying and enjoyable.  Many hands truly do make light work so THANK YOU for the extra help and adding joy to the experience!

Day 4: Nordegg

Got up early Monday morning and drove to Nordegg with Chephren.  The plan was to spend some time with some close friends and soak up some mountain energy.  Chephren was great company for the entire car ride and as soon as those mountains were in view we both knew that we had come 'home'.  Chephren talked about Nordegg almost daily while we were in Maui and there is no question how drawn he is to the area.  I feel the same way.  Really feeling grateful for this place and the fact that we are building a house there.  Thank you Universe for bringing this tiny little town and community into our lives and hearts!

Day 5: Great Food... Great Friends... Super GRATEFUL

The time spent with my friends was AMAZING.  These women (and you too Chris!) filled my cup so much so that I have a renewed sense of purpose, vigor, inner stillness and peace.  I feel ready for the tasks/challenges that lay ahead as well as the gifts that continue to flow in.  Plus, I didn't even have to cook dinner tonight :)  Thank you all for an amazing day!  (P.S.  I also received a Chakra-clearing set from Ken - so thank you for the very thoughtful and generous gift Ken)

Day 6: Home Sweet Home

As much as I love being in Nordegg (and I greatly look forward to the day when we live there permanently), it is always nice to come home to comfortable surroundings.  The fire in the woodstove, my warm and comfy bed and my wonderful husband.  Today's gift is all about being grateful for what I get to have every. single. day. 

Chephren - also happy to be home!

Stay tuned for more Gifts from the Universe!

Marebare

The Receiving Project

'Tis the season for Giving/Receiving gifts.  If you have been following my blog for any amount of time, you will know that I am not a huge fan of this process as traditionally it has been associated with a tremendous amount of excess/consumerism/greed/waste, etc.  So when I found out about The Receiving Project from a friend, I was super excited to get involved and spread the word.  Here is what this project is all about (excerpts taken from the e-mail that I received from my friend):

The gist of The Receiving Project is that you declare your intention to receive a gift from the universe everyday for 32 days. This can come in any and every form. If you feel like it's a gift that you were able to receive then it counts.

To set your intention, it may be helpful to say it out loud, say it to yourself, read it or write it. I find it helpful to do this everyday. But that is not necessary. There is no right or wrong way to do this project. The intention that I set is, "It is my intention to receive gifts of loving from The Universe."

Throughout the days, be aware of what gifts show up in your life. These can come in all shapes and sizes! Allow yourself to be surprised, as setting the intention to receive presents is a powerful beacon of attraction! This isn't necessarily about receiving something specific. Just be open to the goodness in The Universe and see what shows up.

Click here to find out more about The Receiving Project or check out their page on Facebook.

I am already on Day 7 of the Project and will be posting my first entry shortly.

Here is to receiving gifts that are meaningful and authentic.

Feel the BLISS!

Marebare

Quick update

Lots of change happening here on the the old Hasse Ranch (or as my friend recently wrote as he addressed our Christmas card 'La Hassienda' -- don't know why I never thought of that before, love it!).  I have started a new project (I know what you are thinking, what NOW? But it is a much simpler project than the last one, believe me), and before I start posting about it, I was feeling like I needed to update my readers briefly (okay, let's be honest, am I ever brief?  No, but I am going to give it a shot).

So, here is what is UP:

• I am going to use point form to help me keep it brief (this girl is thinking this fine, frigid morning!)
• We are moving.  (Can I please get a yahoo?)  We are moving into the nearest town - Stony Plain into Trent's Dad's house.  It is a LOOOONG story how this all came to be, and I won't bore you with the details but the bottom line is: Smaller house + Less Driving + Opportunity to PURGE my material life = Blissful Me!
• My parents are also moving - check that, have MOVED.  Also into Stony Plain and will be living 1.5 miles away from us.  Yes, I measured and yes, it is going to feel like half a world away, but we are telling ourselves it is SHORT TERM!
• I spent the month of November in Maui.  I didn't blog because I wanted to 'disconnect' from technology and 'reconnect' with 'Le Nature'.  It was amazing.  I did outside yoga almost daily, watched the sunset over the ocean many, many times, went parasailing, went diving, went whale watching, and spent a glorious amount of time by the pool and on the beach with my family.  In other words, I spent most of the month feeling inner bliss.  (And no, I am not overjoyed to be back home in Canada, but I am getting used to it!)

I think that's about it.  See?  Brief.

What?

Oh... the Project.  Nope.  Not telling.  I am working on the first post right now and you will have to wait for it.  Not long though, I promise ;)

Here's to CHANGE!

Love,
Marebare xoxo

We do it to ourselves...

Welcome to Adulthood!  You will now be faced with a series of extremely difficult and life-altering choices that look something like this:

• Go to college - don't go to college
• Get married - don't get married
• Have kids - don't have kids
• Have one kid - have more kids
• Stay at home with the kid(s) - go back to work

Each decision with its own set of pros and cons, benefits and costs and frankly mind-blowing ramifications.  And yet, everyone usually has a strong opinion about each of these very personal choices (the key word here is personal... in case the italics didn't cover it) -- we call that judgement folks, otherwise known as 'should-ing'. 

So when faced with these decisions, they actually look something like this:

• Go to college - don't go to college (but for heaven's sake MAKE A DECISION and god forbid you should ever change your mind!)
• Get married - don't get married (AKA, you'd better get married lest you be livin' in SIN, Oh, and if you don't have a partner - WHY NOT?  WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?)
• Have kids - don't have kids (In other words, you'd better be having them, and if you can't, WHY CAN'T YOU??? So there you are, left with the equally challenging option of fertility treatments - no fertility treatments or adopt - don't adopt)
• Have one kid - have more kids (Well finally, you had one and WHAT?  You're even considering stopping there?  WHAT THE HELL?)
• Stay at home with the kid(s) - go back to work (Well, aren't you lucky if this decision is even part of your reality you spoiled BRAT!)

Seem a little harsh?  Maybe, but in the past 14 years, I can honestly say that I have fielded questions in each of these categories and been met with similar responses - either real or perceived.  Yes, you read that correctly, I said real or perceived.  What I am trying to say is that yes, you will be judged by many others for any/all decisions that you make in life.  However, if you can forgive/accept yourself for making those choices (or avoiding them all together) then there won't be a problem.  In other words, be kind to yourself and the rest will follow...

Sounds simple enough, right?  It really is.  So ALLOW, and let go of JUDGEMENT (especially of yourself, but of others too).  And for pete's sake, quit 'should-ing' all over yourself!

Wishing you light and love as you make each of the 'tough' decisions...

Marebare

My 'treatment' for the Rainy-Day Blues

I wouldn't last a day living out on the West Coast!  It has been raining for one whole day and I am already feeling 'melancholy' (even though we DESPERATELY need the moisture - our lake is drying up for heaven's sake!)  Anyway, when I am feeling blue, I try to focus on all of the things that are going right - instead of those that are going not-so-right...

So, here is my list of the 'Top 10 things going right' with this project:

1. My son (aka 'snackman') loves the homemade crackers that I have been making - in fact, he just finished dragging me over to the cupboard to fill up his bowl.

2. I haven't used my dryer since I unplugged it back in February - and I sure do love the smell of my line-dried clothes/sheets/towels.  Nothing like it, seriously.
3. Meatless Mondays are getting less painful for my family members every week.  To quote my husband this past Monday, "This is the best one so far hun".  Thank goodness for Mollie Katzen and her amazing veggie recipes!  On top of that, I have drastically reduced the amount of meat that I cook with during the rest of the week. 
4. My hygiene regimen is getting greener (and simpler) each week.  As I gradually run out of the toxic products, I have been replacing them with natural ones or often, none at all.
5. My sewing is going really well... I am about 50/50 for projects that have actually turned out!
6. The grow-op continues to be a success.  The broccoli has been moved outside and the bigger plants have been transplanted to bigger pots.  A few more weeks and they can move outside!  I went to a local horticulture presentation a few weeks back and learned some catchy techniques for saving water for them too, so I am excited to try it out!
7. My new library card has already been so well-used that I am practically becoming a fixture in that place!  Chephren loves the visits (and the new books!) and it has been a fabulous motivator to force me to read books from start to finish in a reasonable amount of time.  (I used to read 4-5 books at a time over months - can you say ADD?)
8. I don't miss shopping... at all.  And I have learned to be patient and when I do actually need something... it goes on 'the list'.  I know now that I'll find it eventually.
9. We have ditched the Teflon pans in favor of the cast iron ones... we had already done this years ago (the cast iron ones were in our 'camping gear'), and I can't remember exactly why we switched back to using the Deathflon... anyhow, we have righted this wrong and are back on track.  My parents have made the switch too... sweet!
10. I have connected with a wonderful group of people from this project - some old friends and some new. Your input, advice and support have made this project that much more enjoyable. 

There.  And yes, I do feel a little bit better.  Although I think that I'll go and pour myself a glass of wine now, just to seal the deal :)

Happy Humpday Everyone!

Marebare