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Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The winds of change are blowing...

I think that I've talked about this before... in fact, I know that I did.  I wrote about people changing (and argued that they do, and that I did).  Now I am going to write about the other side of the coin so-to-speak, the part where we, humans, society, (or what have you) aren't always open to change.  In fact, that is putting it lightly.  People (or so it would appear to me) generally abhor change.

But why?  What is it about change that makes us crazy?  I changed my blog formatting for example (and I will totally admit that it is making me uncomfortable).  It is something simple and in the big scheme of things not at all important, and yet, discomfort, uncertainty, and maybe even some anxiety are creeping in.  Now magnify that by about a billion and we are getting to the heart of it.  Change in people's lives is a HUGE deal.  Change at work, change at home, change in your relationships, change in the economy, change on a GLOBAL scale.  And I hate to break it to you, but the changes are just going to keep coming, faster and more 'furious' than ever before. 

So how do we cope with all of this change?  Well, the first thing I am going to say is that to resist change is futile (more about futility, I know!)  Resisting isn't going to stop the inevitable and in fact will only delay your acceptance of it, leaving you 'behind the 8 ball' as you attempt to reconcile the change(s) once you have finally accepted them.

If we aren't resisting change, what are we doing then?  The feelings I described above are real... they exist and I would even say they are warranted.  I am not saying 'don't feel that way' or 'suck it up princess' or 'would you like some cheese to go with that whine' (or any other silly cliche for that matter).  What I am trying to get at is how do we acknowledge those feelings and then move beyond them. 

This is the part where I have you waiting on the edge of your seat right?  You are fully expecting me to have the answer and share it with you, yes? 

The truth is, I am still trying to sort it out myself.  I feel like saying, 'All that I know for sure is that I don't know' (!).  Not helpful, I know.  But I guess it begins with awareness and 'shedding light' on the situation. 

Here is what I am proposing... the next time that you see the above sign (metaphorically people, stay with me!), I would encourage you to follow these principles:

  1. Don't hit the panic button!  And I know that you know exactly what I'm talking about!  Another way to think of this step is to BLINK AND BREATHE!  Pause, delay, in orther words do whatever it takes to 'stall' your instinctive reaction (it's just your ego rearing its ugly head).  Stalling will allow you the time to get into your heart instead - where your intuition lives...
  2. Notice, shine the light on, bring awareness to what is coming up for you: what emotions are you feeling and where do you feel them in your body.  Now here is the tricky part... You actually need to feel them... breathe into them.  A wise friend of mine helped me to see that during this step walking outside and being in nature helps.  The physical movement actually helps to move those emotions through and out of the body.  Sounds simple (and obvious) but it works!  Even better if you can do this with a great friend who will listen to you but not enable you to stay in those feelings for too long.
  3. Now that you have acknowledged and released the feelings and emotions associated with the 'change' that you are fearing, you should feel lighter... like there is now some 'space' in the body/mind to look at the situation in a new way.  Now you are ready to allow the change... and yes, even accept it.

The winds of change are eternally blowing, and yes, the wind might even be picking up in your corner of the world.  The choice is yours, continue to resist or figure out how to integrate, accept and maybe even thrive on change. 

I know what I'm picking, do you?


1 comment:

  1. "Now here is the tricky part... You actually need to feel them..." Oh, truer words were never spoken.

    I'm sort of chuckling to myself because I spent several hours yesterday making a bunch of little 2 person sized lasagnas and freezing them. You see, CatMan has a "thing" about lasagna, and it isn't so much that he loves lasagna above all else, it's that he loves predictability in food above all else! Alas, I have given up because all efforts to get him to embrace change in this department have failed. Sigh.